RESPECT
Respect is very
vital when it comes to marriage. Respect is the acknowledgement we extend to a
person irrespective of the person’s status, belief, among others. A marriage
where there is respect is very good, smooth and enjoyable. Both partners should
respect each others decisions; remember you are two different people getting to
know and adapt to each other. Mutual respect is essential in maintaining a
healthy relationship. A situation where one refuses to respect the other can
result in big problem, thereby destroying the marriage.
Always be cautious
of the kind of words you use, it should be harmless rather than harmful to the
soul. “Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to
the bones” (Proverbs 16:24). Respect each others professions, talents, goals,
decisions, among others.
TOLERANCE
Tolerance is the
willingness to accept somebody or something, especially, opinions and behavior
that you may not agree with. Partners may not always fully agree with each
other, but they must learn to accept and become tolerant of their differences. Tolerance
is what you are willing to put up with
or deal with for the rest of your married days. Sometimes, you have to be
patient and try not to argue unnecessarily. I have formed acronyms with
the word ‘TOLERANCE’.
T- Trust
O- Obey
L- Listen
E- Endure
R- Respect
A- Assist
N- Nicely
C – Communicate
E- Effectively
SEX
Many people use
marriage as a means of satisfying their sexual desires. If your main aim of
getting married is to avoid breaking God’s commandment, then you are making a
big mistake. You might be wondering why I’m saying so, isn’t it?
Remember,
marriage is not only about sex; it entails a lot more than sex, so if sex is
your motive for getting married, then your marriage will just tear apart. Sex
is necessary in a marriage but do not make it your main priority. So if you are
thinking of marrying because of sex, think twice about that.
Sex is one of
the crucial roles of a healthy and happy marriage, but now due to career and
daily routines, people hardly have time for it. There is usually less time for
sex as relationships develop and partners take on more responsibilities. After
a hard day’s work, one feels too tired to touch his or her spouse. At times, one
partner may want to have sex, but the other may not.
Sex is an issue
many people do not give much priority to; however, it can cause serious
misunderstandings in marriage. Fatigue is a common explanation offered by
partners who decline their spouse’s invitation for sex. Many women reject their
husbands when they want sex. Remember, you’re indirectly allowing your husband
to have multiple partners. I’m not suggesting that you have sex even when you’re
tired. Some women just use that as an excuse to prevent their husbands from
touching them. Women arise and take your positions so that other women do not ruin
your marriage by giving your husband what you deny him.
Some men also
love sex to the extent that they want to have it every day of the week. Please
control your feelings for your wives need space also. Sex is important but it
should not be abused, otherwise it loses its value. When your sexual feelings
are aroused, you can go for a walk, play with the kids, or drive to a friend’s
house. You must find a way to curb your sexual desires if they are too intense
and frequent. If not, it may become a habit that will be difficult to handle.
If you are unable to control your sexual desires, it can affect your marriage
negatively to the extent that if your wife is not available for sex, you might
end up sleeping with your house help or another woman, which can end up destroying
your marriage. Remember, God frowns upon adultery.
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